It’s really good to know there’s a blog dedicated to some bitchy wife and her retarded complaints about her husband leaving the toilet seat up, not changing the baby’s diaper quickly enough and opening new containers of hair gel before finishing the old ones. I also really enjoy the side-slappingly funny entertainment like, “Where did my husband leave his dirty socks today?” and “guess how much I hate my husband’s fashion sense?”
Let me quote some passages from this modern day Emily Dickinson.
My daughter has had a cold lately which means that, of course, my husband got sick too. Except that his cold seems to be about a million times worse and lasts a million times longer than my daughter’s cold. (Note the use of the word “seems”. It’s not actually worse nor does it actually last longer. But so far he hasn’t taught my daughter the fine art of exaggerating or acting like a huge baby for fun.)
He must love it when his wife calls him huge baby in a public forum. Now on to a discussion of his eating habits.
The other night, he ate a gigantic piece of cheesecake and then followed that up with half a bag of chips and couldn’t understand why he felt like he was going to throw up. The really annoying part about this is that my husband is super-thin. I mean the kind of thin where he could probably stand to eat a few cartons of ice cream a day to gain some weight. Meanwhile, if I have even a few spoonfuls of ice cream I see it in my thighs the next day. Where’s the justice?
I’d call that justice. If she’s isn’t already fat, which I’m sure she is, I hope she swells up to the size of Moby Dick and has to ride a fat person cart for the rest of her life.
It’s supposed to snow tonight. A lot, apparently – I’ve heard reports of up to 15 inches of snow. Anybody want to start placing bets as to how long it’ll take for my husband to shovel the driveway? I’m predicting he’s going to put it off until the weekend. Ugh…
That one was a complete day’s entry, by the way. My response if it were my wife:
How about shoveling it yourself? If you’re so cool and independent that you can trash your husband in public on the internet (complete with his pictures) then I think you’re qualified to shut up and shovel the driveway.
And the socks, God she hates his socks.
I’ve come up with a new game! It’s called, “Let’s see where my husband’s smelly, dirty socks have ended up today!”
After my last post about my how my husband leaves his dirty socks on the couch (and after my baby once again tried to shove his dirty socks into her mouth), I pleaded with him to please stop putting your nasty, dirty socks on the couch. To his credit, he’s making an effort – though not always successfully.
I ask my husband why he can’t just put them in the hamper and he gives me a blank stare as if I’m speaking a foreign language. Who knew that hamper wasn’t a part of my husband’s English vocabulary? So yeah, disgusting dirty socks left on the couch that end up in my daughter’s mouth are why I dislike Winter. (And don’t even get me started on my husband’s love of turtlenecks. Ugh…)
These are just a small sampling of her vast library of sock related complaints. You know what a good Mexican wife does? She picks up the socks, doesn’t complain about it, and gets on with her life. She helps out without being a bitch, and her happy husband helps her out. You know, like a team. But this teamwork ideal is not the mindset of the American wife. In that mindset, men are bumbling annoying idiots with disgusting habits that have to be tolerated in their slovenly stupidity.
This blog is a great illustration of the fucked up mindset of stupid self-entitled American women, and their incredibly pedestrian sense of humor. Read the comments left on the blog and you will find a whole host of women bitching about their husbands drinking milk out of the carton, watching sports, and not taking out the trash. But they excuse it by saying:
… just 2 weeks before the wedding, I really got to discover just how annoying he can be. Don’t get me wrong – I love my husband tons but Dear God, he can irritate the crap outta me.
Guys, if you’re thinking about getting married, show your woman this blog. You’ll know right away from her reaction what you’re dealing with. If she says, “Eeewww, I hate dirty nasty smelly socks on the floor.”, DO NOT MARRY HER. If she says, “Wow, what a bitch!”, then you know you are either lucky or somewhere outside of the United States.
How pathetic but also not news worthy… you suck CBS!
I just have to add a couple of quick thoughts here.
1.) How pathetic is this chick that she has nothing better do to with her time than write this bullshit? I mean clearly she has way too much free time on her hands even after dealing with the dirty sock fiasco… I wonder if she ever considered doing something productive?
2.) How pathetic is her poor husband? How can he let her get away with publicly humiliating him?